Joseph the Human Beatbox

Who said you need instruments to make music. Presenting Joseph:

How Moral are you?

Here is a fun little quiz gruesome dark quiz testing how moral you are.
It deals with life and death situations and how you would sacrifice someone to save yourself and the greater majority.

Try the quiz here.

I will not post my results, but feel free to post yours in the comments.

Husband and Wife Joke

A husband and wife are sitting quietly in bed reading when the wife looks over at him and asks a bold question.
WIFE: "What would you do if I died? Would you get married again?"

HUSBAND: "Definitely not!"

WIFE: "Why not - don't you like being married?"

HUSBAND: "Of course I do."

WIFE: "Then why wouldn't you remarry?"

HUSBAND: "Okay, I'd get married again."

WIFE: "You would?" (with a hurtful look on her face).

HUSBAND: (makes audible groan).

WIFE: "Would you live in our house?"

HUSBAND: "Sure, it's a great house."

WIFE: "Would you sleep with her in our bed?"

HUSBAND: "Where else would we sleep?"

WIFE: "Would you let her drive my car?"

HUSBAND: "Probably, it is almost new."

WIFE: "Would you replace my pictures with hers?"

HUSBAND: "That would seem like the proper thing to do."

WIFE: "Would she use my golf clubs?"

HUSBAND: "No, she's left-handed."

WIFE: -- silence --

HUSBAND: "Shit!!"

Pakistan's Got Talent

Kashif from Pakistan goes to the talent show, "America's Got Talent", and blows them away with a Bollywood dance. Being new to Bollywood style dancing, the audience first gave him weird looks, then got into it and ended his performance with thunderous applause.

Don't Give up on Vista

I got a new laptop. I turned it on and to my shock horror surprise amusement. I thought, let me give Vista a chance. I tried to start a few programs, and I got a multitude of dialog boxes asking me to confirm each and every action to keep me safe and warn me about potential security threats. "Are you sure you want to do this ?", "Your information might be exposed", "You are going to an unsafe link", "Do you want coffee?", "Do you need a jacket to keep warm?". OK, the last two are my own.

After a few hours of this ordeal, I started swearing at Vista. "Vista is the bloody operating system, it is running on a high powered dual core brand new laptop, if I need to tell it how to keep me safe then I don't need it.

I had 2 choices, downgrade to Windows XP or try Ubuntu. I did not have any important data on the laptop so I downloaded the latest version of Ubuntu Gutsy gibbon and booted up with my freshly burnt CD. It booted up and gave me the option to install, which I happily did.

Surprisingly, Ubuntu detected all my hardware even my Bluetooth, and worked seamlessly. I started playing with it and so far so good. No problems, no crashes, no freezing and no irritating dialog boxes. I installed some software for Ubuntu and never did it ask me to reboot as Windows always does.

I think I will stay with Ubuntu for a while.

Iran - Some Pictures

The Little Girl

Here is a charming little story called The Little Girl who was Forgotten by absolutely everyone (even the postman)

Sweet yet morbid, but very artistic.

Powerpoint Tip

Everyone knows PowerPoint, it is the ubiquitous tool from Microsoft that allows you to give presentations. Walk in any airport lounge and you will see salesmen and consultants tweaking their PowerPoint presentations to their potential customers.

Contact any vendor and tell him you are interested in their products and they will email you their latest PowerPoint presentation promoting their best and latest features.

A PowerPoint file is saved with a PPT extension which allows you to load it and edit it if needed. Sometimes, PowerPoint presentations are saved in PPS which does not allow you to open the file, it will just display the presentation to you thus protecting the contents from being copied or changed.

On my home laptop, I do not have Microsoft office installed, instead I have the freeware OpenOffice. I recently opend a pss presentation and using the OpenOffice equivalent to PowerPoint called impress and to my pleasant surprise I could edit the presentation.

So next time you get a PowerPoint PPS saved file and you would like to steal borrow a slide or graphics, open it with OpenOffice and take all you like.

Two Time Wasters

Tomorrow is the start of the work week. If you would like to make the time pass until it is time to leave for home, then here are two interesting links:

One is an Mp3 searcher that uses Google to find the latest mp3, no need to use p2p or punch a hole in your work proxy, you can download directly from the web. The site is NetRipper and can be found here.

The other link is an interesting but gross game called Acne be gone, the point is to squeeze as much acne on a face. The faster you are the better you score. The game comes complete with a disgusting squishing sound, be sure to turn the sound down when you play it. The game can be found here.

Have a productive work day.

Starbucks Training Video

Here is something interesting that I found while browsing youtube and craving coffee, a Strabucks training video.






Now how does our Kuwait Starbucks measure up ?

1) Be Welcoming - "Heeelloo suuurrr", yup they are welcoming.
2) Be Knowledgeable - well most of them are, but I don't like the cross selling.
3) Be Involved - They do give barrista lessons, I don't know about other community activities.
4) Be Considerate - I dropped a few coffees and they did replace it for me for free, so that counts for being considerate.


All in all pretty good.

Man Marries Bitch

P. Selvakumar married the sari-draped former stray named Selvi, chosen by family members and then bathed and clothed for the ceremony Sunday at a Hindu temple in the southern state of Tamil Nadu, the Hindustan Times newspaper said.

Selvakumar, 33, told the paper he had been suffering since he stoned two dogs to death and hung their bodies from a tree 15 years ago.

More details here at yahoo news.

I am sure he is the only man in the world to honestly say that his wife is a bitch.

Caviar

Does anyone know where I can get some original Caspian sea caviar in Kuwait?

I am not talking about the cheap red Nordic sea caviar, or the black dyed caviar that you find in the coops and makes your tongue turn blue after you eat some of it.

I am talking about the grayish black caviar that is in the blue tin and looks like the picture below:





I googled "caviar kuwait" but all I got was an ad agency called caviar, of course you cannot spread an ad agency on a piece of buttered toast.

I remember seeing some tins in the Crowne Plaza gift shop but when I called, they said they did not have any.

Anyone knows where I can find some Caviar?

Crazy Internet Trick

Here is a fun little trick you can do.

Go to google images search, type a search subject. Once you got the search pictures displayed on your page, past this javascript code in your adress bar and hit enter

javascript:R=0; x1=.1; y1=.05; x2=.25; y2=.24; x3=1.6; y3=.24; x4=300; y4=200; x5=300; y5=200; DI= document.images; DIL=DI.length; function A()
{for(i=0; i
Crazy, right?

CORRECTION: The javascript code above is being clipped by blogger, you can get the code here.

Acoustic Guitars

It has bee a busy few days and I have not blogged for a while, now with the weekend starting, here are a few acoustic guitar performances that I particularly like:



Antonio Banderas


Mason Williams - Classical Gas

Horoscope

I am a Libra, although I don't believe in Astrology. I have a hard time believing general statements that can apply to anything and anyone. What is my horoscope today? According to msn astrology:

An unexpected phone call, perhaps from an old friend, could come your way today, dear Libra. This person is apt to have good news for you, though he or she may be in a rather melancholy mood. A long conversation could result, the outcome of which is going to change your life, albeit in a subtle way. Nonetheless, this is apt to be a day full of pleasant surprises. Enjoy it!

Let me check my mobile, I got a call from Oracle, but it was not an old friend, it was more like an Oracle sales man sniffing around for confidential insider information. I politely told him to email me instead of cold calling me. Other than that no surprise phone calls.

I need my Horoscope to be specific and detailed, something like:

Don Veto, yes Don, I am talking to you! Don't go to work today, go straight to the stock market, you will find a free parking place next to the falafel restaurant. Buy all you can of NBK stock, wait until it hits that price then sell all. You will make enough to last a month then do that again when you run out of money.

Now that would be something I could read and act on every day.