2006-09-03

Twenty Eight Facts about Marriage

  1. Marriage is not a word. It's a sentence (a life sentence).
  2. Marriage is love. Love is blind. Therefore marriage is an institution for the blind.
  3. Marriage is an institution in which a man loses his Bachelor's Degree and the woman gets her masters.
  4. Marriage is a three-ring circus: engagement ring, wedding ring and suffering.
  5. Married life is full of excitement and frustration:
        In the first year of marriage, the man speaks and the woman listens;
        In the second year, the woman speaks and the man listens.
        In the third year, they both speak and the NEIGHBOUR listens.
  1. Getting married is very much like going to a restaurant with friends.You order what you want, and when you see what the other person has, you wish you had ordered that instead.
  2. There was this man who muttered a few words in the church and found himself married. A year later he muttered something in his sleep and found himself divorced.
  3. A happy marriage is a matter of giving and taking; the husband gives and the wife takes.
  4. Son: How much does it cost to get married, Dad? Father: I don't know son, I'm still paying for it.
  5. Son: Is it true Dad? I heard that in ancient China, a man doesn't know his wife until he marries her. Father: That happens everywhere, son, EVERYWHERE!
  6. Love is one long sweet dream, and marriage is the alarm clock.
  7. They say that when a man holds a woman's hand before marriage, it is love; after marriage it is self-defense.
  8. When a newly married man looks happy, we know why. But when a 10-year married man looks happy, we wonder why.
  9. There was this lover who said that he would go through hell for her. They got married, and now he is going through HELL.
  10. When a man steals your wife, there is no better revenge than to let him keep her.
  11. After marriage, husband and wife become two sides of a coin. They just can't face each other, but they still stay together.
  12. Marriage is man and a woman become one. The trouble starts when they try to decide which one.
  13. Before marriage, a man yearns for the woman he loves. After the marriage the "Y" becomes silent.
  14. I married Miss right; I just didn't know her first name was Always.
  15. It's not true that married men live longer than single men, it only seems longer.
  16. Losing a wife can be hard. In my case, it was almost impossible.
  17. A man was complaining to a friend: I HAD IT ALL-MONEY, A BEAUTIFUL HOUSE, THE LOVE OF A BEAUTIFUL WOMAN, THEN POW! IT WAS ALL GONE. WHAT HAPPENED, asked his friend. He says MY WIFE FOUND OUT.
  18. WIFE: Let's go out and have some fun tonight. HUSBAND: OK, but if you get home before I do, leave the hallway lighs on.
  19. At a cocktail party, one woman said to another: AREN'T YOU ! WEARING YOUR RING ON THE WRONG FINGER? The other replied, YES, I, AM. I MARRIED THE WRONG MAN.
  20. Man is incomplete until he gets married, then he is finished.
  21. It doesn't matter how often a married man changes his job, he still ends up with the same boss.
  22. A man inserted an ad in the paper - WIFE WANTED. The next day he received a hundred of letters and they all said the same thing - YOU CAN HAVE MINE.
  23. When a man opens the door of his car for his wife, you can be sure of one thing - either the car is new or the wife is.

12 comments:

  1. Hey, thats so insulting to women, its not 28 facts about marriage, its all against women....

    Its too exaggerated, so the men are poor guys?? BOO HOO

    ReplyDelete
  2. LOL! Now, why are you doing this? Scaring all the single guys out there.. They were already scared to death! *giggles*

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  3. loool ....!!! don veto u list 28 true facts about marrige...but to correct these facts... it should applies both side to men &women...and to add one
    in marriage the other part becmoes like amex card ... u cant leave home with out it.....

    ReplyDelete
  4. puppy: which fact is blatantly wrong? I will remove it. ;-)

    cute: well they need to know what they are getting into.

    free: of course, this is not a full list, feel free to add more.

    ReplyDelete
  5. LMAO....it's kinda scary/sad but mostly TRUE....and it goes both ways....May I borrow this (copy and paste)???

    ReplyDelete
  6. vie: feel free to copy and paste, spread the love :-)

    Could you just add a little link pointing to my blog also, I love watching my hits counter increase.

    ReplyDelete
  7. 2. marriage is not always love, marriage can be inevitable, arranged.
    3. that is untrue, more men get with less degrees than women, actually the women have to sink low to raise the men up. and i mean that literally.
    6. true, for everything, not only marriage, there is no 8ana3a.

    to be accurate,this post should be cold: twenty eight negative facs about marriage.

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  8. bloo: Ok, your points are noted,

    everyone: this post is meant as a joke, marriage can't be that awful, otherwise why is everyone getting married.

    ReplyDelete
  9. Hmmm dunno, marriage is weird. When you are out you want in, and as soon as you're in you want out.

    Some of these facts are actually true. Thanks goodness for people who can look at marriages with humour (especially their own)

    ;-)

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  10. Some of it is true. but it's mostly funny.

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  11. there are good sides to marriage, like trust, comfort, and intimacy, we just haven't been able to value them, all we see is the bad side, if people have it good, they are scared others will jinx them.

    ReplyDelete